The Assassins' Guild: Lent 2008 Game Awards

For various achievements and entertainments, the following awards are presented:

The Lemming Award for the first to die:
Matt Green, stabbed before marriage by Anna Kalorkoti.
The Holzhauer Award for psychopathy:
Jacob Samuel Corteen, for killing 7 dudes.
Also psychopathic:
Luke Richard Bennett, with 6 kills.
The 'I Shot the Sheriff' Award for butchering cops:
Jen Berry for killing the chief, Tom Wootten, and Benjamin Weaver for killing Michael William Donaghy. During the police war, numerous police killed numerous others, and a special mention to Philip Bielby and William Brooks should be made for taking the fight to the other side.
The Mario Sainz-Martinez Award for cowwuption:
Most of the police force were corrupt at some point, but the most corrupt by far was William Brooks. Corrupt to numerous players and ever undermined the authority of a superior (Colin Love) by requesting a live player to shoot him.
The Butch Cassidy Award for Most Doomed Killing Spree:
Tom Booth turned up to Cambridge to kill as many assassins as he could in a short space of time, didn't have access to the player list as he didn't have a computer with him. Also, his only ally, Jacob Samuel Corteen, was the only player who deliberately did not use the player list, so he didn't know who to kill, and eventually died whilst attempting a backstab. Poor Tom. Pom.
The Dr Kimble Award for surviving the longest time on the wanted list:
Joshua Guy Blanchard Lewis, who managed 7 days, 20 hours and 45 minutes.
The Jake Corteen Award for dying far too many times:
William Brooks died as a player and numerous times as police towards the end of the game, so that even The Umpire lost track of whether he was alive of dead.
The David Duffit Award for secrecy and deception:
Michael William Donaghy who carefully negotiated agreements with many players to side against Simeon Bird in the game, or so he thought.
The Darwin Award for death by stupidity:
Jaya Chedumbarum-Pillay who attacked Jacob Samuel Corteen while he was out of bounds, then waited outside and was surprised that he tried to kill her after he was finished, which he did successfully.
The Laurel And Hardy Award for most amusing double-act:
Tom Booth and Jacob Samuel Corteen spent a day running around Cambridge trying to kill people, with Tom stealing most of Jake's kills, and then finally attempting to backstab him and failing.
The 'Ginger Cake' Award for the 'smoothest' kill:
Benjamin Weaver absailed out of his window and sneaky-sneaky'd three competent assassins led by none other than Doctor J Doe, thus proving that it does take >3 fresher assassins to defeat Benjamin Weaver.
The Reversed Burden of Johannes Award for unintentionally killing innocents:
Joshua Guy Blanchard Lewis's ability to find the correct individual and/or bike was faulty for much of the game, leading to a lot of people's hands covered in vaseline, and this only covers those he unintentionally killed!
The David and Goliath Award for Best Giant-Killing Activity by a New Player:
Roisin Kiberd managed to take down Jacob Samuel Corteen using some sneaky-sneaky tactics at the KamBar.
The Catherine Zentile Award for least innocent innocent:
J Doe, who was totally running the game as usual.
The Brutus Award for best betrayal:
Simeon Bird having found out about the secretive and slightly less deceptive Michael William Donaghy's intent to kill him, backstabbed him at the first possible opportunity. Well, you would, wouldn't you?
The Yellow Streak Award for impersonating Michael Wallace:
Joshua Guy Blanchard Lewis slept on J Doe's floor for "tactical reasons" which were almost certainly so that he didn't have to leave his own room on the first few mornings after going wanted.
The Gary Lineker Award for Sportsmanship:
Jacob Samuel Corteen for not using the player list which had accidentally been given out by the league of Umpires, and didn't do too badly from having an information disadvantage.

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